How the hell am I supposed to put an end to this clumsy feeling in my tummy? It makes me feel giddy, dizzy and what not! Why do I like him, but I still don't like him? Why does he look at me accusingly? Why does he make me feel like I'm wrong? Why does it look like he knows about my feelings for him? Isn't he supposed to act like I exist? Why the hell doesn't he understand how deep I'm falling? Isn't he supposed to give me a cue? I wish he would come and talk to me, I wish these feelings would die out.... :/
Monday 12 September 2011
Saturday 10 September 2011
The 'on n off' way life is!
While reading a novel 'bout Hollywood today, I figured out that the lives of celebs aren't really hunky-dory all the time. It's not just about being clicked, looking great and rubbing shoulders with the who's who. Sometimes, it's also about living life the 'normal' way. If our lives were to be put under the scanner, they would pretty much turn out to be replicas of celebrity lives. The paparazzi of nagging teachers running behind us, carrying the cameras of taunts and lectures; sometimes we are so hollowed out inside that we live a different life when in the public eye, and our real lives are complete contradictions to that. Sometimes we lie so much that the fibs actually seem to be real. We become alter-egos of ourselves.
For all these years, I had been doing fantastically in academics, little did I know that I was in for a rude shock! Like my mum says, 'You aren't born with some tag stamped on your name that makes teachers give you marks as soon as they see your name". It all ended up with my best friend having to ask me whether there was something wrong with me and I was tongue-tied and could not answer him. What the hell do I do when my life is going so great and suddenly it all stops and ends up in an abusive fight?! What do I do when I can't go a minute without swearing at someone and then have to swear on my dad that I won't abuse anyone? Moreover, what do I do when my best friend, who admires my crush, suddenly calls him a transgender-ed person??
But, as they say, "That's life, baby!",and what I do is that I cope up with all this, count my blessings, gather my ammunition and get ready to face all the challenges head-on! Beacuse, no matter how much I might dislike my life, I love the people in my life, and I wouldn't have it any other way! =D
For all these years, I had been doing fantastically in academics, little did I know that I was in for a rude shock! Like my mum says, 'You aren't born with some tag stamped on your name that makes teachers give you marks as soon as they see your name". It all ended up with my best friend having to ask me whether there was something wrong with me and I was tongue-tied and could not answer him. What the hell do I do when my life is going so great and suddenly it all stops and ends up in an abusive fight?! What do I do when I can't go a minute without swearing at someone and then have to swear on my dad that I won't abuse anyone? Moreover, what do I do when my best friend, who admires my crush, suddenly calls him a transgender-ed person??
But, as they say, "That's life, baby!",and what I do is that I cope up with all this, count my blessings, gather my ammunition and get ready to face all the challenges head-on! Beacuse, no matter how much I might dislike my life, I love the people in my life, and I wouldn't have it any other way! =D
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